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It’s a feeling. Not a reality.
You’re feeling insecure, you’re not actually insecure.
*Huge sigh of relief.
Here’s the thing;
How Your Insecurities Started
- Your feelings are caused by your thoughts, thoughts you believe in.
- When someone tells you ‘you’re not smart enough’, you hear it, think about it.
- And in that instant, you’ve either been conditioned to throw out the negative talk or digest it.
- When you digest these thoughts and repeat them you start to believe them.
- Your beliefs now cause your feeling of insecurity, of inadequacy.
- Your feelings strongly prompt your action. That thought, whether positive or negative makes you feel so bad you can’t do anything to achieve your goals or motivate you to prove everyone wrong.
- The actions you’ve been taking, depending on the thoughts and feelings you been having are now the results you have in your life.
Tell me, which side of this spectrum do you fall on? Do you want to change that?
What I’ve learned over the years is that you can control each of these except one.
The circumstance that resulted in the thought in the first place = what you see, hear and read.
From social media, the magazines you read, books and people around you. These are events you can’t control. Called circumstances.
It’s the circumstance that causes everything, but since you can’t control it, you control the next thing that comes after. Your thoughts.
3 Ways to Overcome Your Physical Insecurities
1. Place value before someone does
The value you place on an item depends on if you love it or not. If you deem it important or not. The thing is, you will never have any features if it weren’t useful.
Decide the value your features hold. Start with your eyes down to your feet and write the use of the feature and what it helps you achieve. Give gratitude for it and you will grow to like it.
Then write down the compliments you’ve gotten even if it’s from grandma beside it.
Sit down for a few minutes and choose a unique quality. Like the bright gold specs in your eyes, beautiful freckles on your nose, a sharp cupids bow on your lips and write it down.
For the next few weeks, you’re going to read them to yourself, see them, believe them and love them. Because they are beautiful, you just have to feel it.
Don’t give anyone control over you. Place your value and people will give it to you.
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent
2. Control your thoughts
Our thoughts make our mindset. Our mindset shapes how we respond to things, the actions we take, the habits we keep, and ultimately who we are.
A person thinking ‘I can do this’ and questions how till he finds the answer will live a different life than a person who thinks’ I can’t do it’ and sits down trying to prove all the reasons they can’t.
Which one are you and which one will you rather be?
It doesn’t matter what you’ve gone through, you can change one thought and everything you are will change. You are stronger than your mind.
Think only good thoughts even if you don’t believe them now.
And never believe what someone says about you.
In that same scene, if someone says you’re ugly, you can tell your mind ‘I’m beautiful’. That ugly thought will back off, and you will feel great after.
3. Love yourself despite your flaws and like yourself because of your strengths
So, for now, do you like yourself?
Because you’re pretty,
Because you’re smart,
You’re brave and beautiful.
That’s why other people like you too.
But then do you love yourself.
Are you lovable to people?
Why aren’t you? Maybe because you think you’re not pretty enough? You’re not that smart.
You’ve got it all wrong because to love is to love despite.
Unlike liking, it is to like because.
So you like your face because your eyes are blue but you must love yourself despite that scar on your eyebrows.
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